CYBERSPACE - Flixer, a new app designed by Grinnellians, has taken the student body by storm, and revolutionized the way we “Netflix and Chill.” Flixer is a social media platform designed to match users based on their Netflix interests. Utilizing the amazing swipe technology, accepting or rejecting others is easier than ever. “Everybody wants to watch Netflix,” explains Flixer founder Joshua Graham, “and what we designed is a way to get around all that awful waffling.” Flixer allows users to create a profile with information such as their favorite TV shows, preferred snack food, watching habits, etc. to advertise themselves to prospective Netflix buddies. “Before Flixer,” says Graham, “if I wanted to ask someone else to watch The Walking Dead, I would have to go through the terrifying experience of talking to them, and possibly getting rejected. Flixer, on the other hand, matches you only with other people who are interested in watching The Walking Dead.”

A recent survey among Grinnellians shows that since the advent of Flixer, students have reported having 50% more Netflix partners. Sociology professor Millicent Atkins is astounded by this sharp increase: “Because of this single app, students are enjoying their favorite television with more people than ever before. As a sociologist, this really blows my mind!”

But of course, this large increase in Netflix partners mean protection is extra important, with the risk of spoilers increasing exponentially with the number of partners. “Of course you have to be careful,” says Grinnell senior Daenerys Targaryen, “But that’s to be expected from the best app Q3 2K15.”

Not everyone is happy with Flixer. The head of the Catholic Church, among other religious leaders, has expressed displeasure in the deviance caused by Flixer. “What happened to the sanctity of film? What happened to a man and a woman in a committed, consensual relationship enjoying their favorite motion picture together? Now these whippersnappers come in here and mess it all up! This generation is losing any sense of morality; hooking up with a stranger to watch twenty minutes of TV is now considered a norm.”